The Paradox of Love

In an earlier post Love is in the Air,  I attempted to explore various flavours of love. In any kind of relationship,  one or  more of the flavours would be involved to sustain it.In a broader sense, as prominent spiritual master Sri Sri Ravi Shankar says, “Love is that glue that holds everything together”. Hence love unites, integrates.

Yet, it should not stifle. Even though some kind of interdependence is inherent in Love, it is not true love if it stifles, if it encroaches upon the freedom of another beyond a healthy limit.

Of course we have to consider what kind of love are we talking about? Freedom is inherent in true love. Once you have faith and confidence why would you impose any condition?

Once there is curtailment of freedom, that is the end of love. If one of the parties feels suffocated, then it is not love, but bondage. Bondage and freedom cannot go together.

So, if ever you feel stifled in love, or feel your freedom curtailed, examine. Was it really love?  Or, was it bondage, manipulation or an attempt to control masquerading as love?

From a different perspective, let us consider the following. Love is the process of uniting, merging. Two become one. It is true in the case of romantic love, divine love or any other kind of love. A feeling of oneness comes with love. Where does it leave space for freedom. One feels surrendered in love. In another sense, sacrifice becomes natural. In the land of love, freedom is an absolute stranger. A true lover does not seek to free itself of the beloved, neither does he/she would like to possess the other one and bring the other into submission.

Or rather, in a state of love, one simply does not bother about freedom. Love takes care of everything.

As Rumi says:

“Ride on love and don’t worry about the road!

Because the steed of love has the smoothest ride.
It will take you home in a single thrust.

Even though the road is rough.”

Still, if the question of freedom pops up, let us remember with Kahllil Gibran:

“Love possesses not, nor will it be possessed”.

That is the paradox of the state of love – one does not have the apparent freedom, yet it is love that brings the ultimate freedom.

 

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 Indian Bloggers

18 thoughts on “The Paradox of Love

  1. Very well said Durga Prasad Ji. Right is Khalil Zibran. And right you are as well. Love binds effortlessly at emotional level. However it frees also. If someone tries to curtail another’s freedom under whatever name (including love for him / her), then it can be anything but love. Hearty thanks and compliments for sharing this invaluable thought which should be understood by all who feel they are in love with someone.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah! Pablo Neruda. That master craftsman of poetry.

      “I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
      I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
      so I love you because I know no other way

      than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
      so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
      so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep. ”

      Thanks Umashankar ji.

      Liked by 1 person

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